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Thousands of people all over the country are claiming to experience severe mood changes after ingesting a certain type of fish. None of the reports specifically explain the exact cause of the disorder; however describe those infected as: inspired, proactive, and extremely innovative.
One lady told her colleagues “When I woke up the next morning I still looked like a 40 year old woman in the mirror, but had the energy of a 10 year old. I felt young, courageous, giddy, and completely revitalized.”
Other reports, mainly from the Southeast, have begun to surface. The most extreme story made national news as it affected an entire company in Tallahassee, Florida. All the employees at an anonymous business were so heavily impacted by the toxin that they carved a statue of the fish icon and worship it every morning before work. Rumors claim that a few employees recently got tattoos of the iconic symbol to represent their passion for the fish.
Local businesses in the community have implemented extreme measures including rewards for employees who consume the most fish at work and mandatory Sunday fish outings. Although many workers have lost weight from the new diet, no reports of increased productivity have been reported.
What is this fish? Where did it come from? And why are people so addicted to it?
These are a few questions investigators are determined to find out. If they ever capture the slippery fish Florida State University Chemist Bob Nole claimed he would be “willing to help mass produce the toxin in a pill form. This fish is a natural wonder and the key to curing one America’s of most financially detrimental diseases… complacency.”
Unfortunately, no human has yet to come close to catching this enchanted amphibian. The only leads investigators have is a binary symbol found randomly drawn throughout offices of infected workers.
